As soon as I got successful, the Scottish press started picking on me. It's something they reserve just for me.
Billy ConnollyAll anyone really needs to know about barbed wire is that it can tear the arse out of your trousers, give a cow a good fright, entangle a Yorkshire terrier for life, and is nasty stuff made by greedy men.
Billy ConnollySex therapist claims that the most effective way to arouse your man is to spend 10 minutes licking his ears!! Personally, I think its bollocks!!
Billy ConnollyChic Murray once told me he fell in the street, and a woman said to him, "Did you fall?" He said, "No, I'm tryin' to break a bar of chocolate in my back pocket."
Billy Connolly