We were ensconced as guests of the exclusive Beverly Hilton Hotel, an edifice so swank that the fire ax in the hall outside our suite said: "In case of fire-break crystal."

The California cemeteries make dying sound so attractive it's a real effort to keep breathing.

Then there was the time in Hollywood when I sat down in a breakaway chair and it collapsed on me. I was nearly knocked out and might have been even more seriously hurt but my fall was broken by the smog.

Poor people have more fun than rich people, they say; and I notice it's the rich people who keep saying it.

Looking back, my life so far seems like one long obstacle race, with me as its chief obstacle.

Hollywood, we decided, was a nice place to die, but we wouldn't want to live there.

We were ensconced as guests of the exclusive Beverly Hilton Hotel, an edifice so swank that the fire ax in the hall outside our suite said: "In case of fire-break crystal."