A girl came up to me in a bar and said she wanted to be my apple pie. I wish I'd said something cool, but I was stunned.

Michael Ian Black wears many hats. He's a stand-up comedian, a comedic actor, he's now a writer-director so he knew how to work with all of us. And furthermore, because so much of his career is based on improvisation he gave us the freedom to do that as well.

I'm married. I'm not attracted to any other woman, ever.

I think there's a lack of really, really good funny scripts out there that work on all the levels that they're supposed to - which is to say that they're not just funny but they have interesting characters that people are going to like and be invested in. I've done a bunch of movies that haven't worked but I like to think I've done some that have worked and that's because not only is the comedy there but the characters and storylines are interesting. The characters are real and relateable and people were invested in them.

In high school, I got picked on. It's funny that I got tormented for what I'm doing now - the acting thing. People would see me in a Nickelodeon commercial, and I would hear about it the next day at school. Kids would say, 'Hi, TV Boy.' They heckled. I never got beat up.

What I've learned from fatherhood is that having a son cannot, did not, change my love for The Bachelor! I thought that having a son would make me grow up when it came to my TV viewing habits, but I love The Bachelor even more after having a child.

You realize we're all going to go to college as virgins. They probably have special dorms for people like us.