I hate flossing, I wish I just had one long curvy tooth. They didn't have to make separations for me.
Mitch HedbergThey say the recipe for Sprite is lemon and lime. I tried to make it at home. There's more to it than that.
Mitch HedbergThat's always disappointed me, to see a guy in the crowd who doesn't look like he's having fun but in general if you just listen to the crowd it sounds like they're having fun. So I don't want to focus on the one guy who's not having fun. And by closing my eyes and just listening, I can't hear that he's not laughing but I can see that he's not laughing.
Mitch Hedberg