Failure in the past does not nullify purpose in the future.
Death is just a comma to a Christian, not a period.
There was a time when you were not. There never will be a time when you will not be.
Study the Bible to know about God. Obey the Bible to really know God.
Paul spoke about the root of faith (Eph 2:8). James spoke about the fruit of faith (Jm 2:17-18).
Don't ask God to cram His plan into your puny little mind, because then God would be limited by your understanding.