The pessimist is seldom an agitating individual. His creed breeds indifference to others, and he does not trouble himself to thrust his views upon the unconvinced.

People who cannot recognize a palpable absurdity are very much in the way of civilization.

Humor distorts nothing, and only false gods are laughed off their earthly pedestals.

abroad it is our habit to regard all other travelers in the light of personal and unpardonable grievances. They are intruders into our chosen realms of pleasure, they jar upon our sensibilities, they lessen our meager share of comforts, they are everywhere in our way, they are always an unnecessary feature in the landscape.

Science may carry us to Mars, but it will leave the earth peopled as ever by the inept.

The man who never tells an unpalatable truth 'at the wrong time' (the right time has yet to be discovered) is the man whose success in life is fairly well assured.

the labors of the true critic are more essential to the author, even, than to the reader.