I'm a natural born show off. I love performing, and at school we had a really good music scene and an even better drama scene. When I got to university, I played in bands and did sketch stuff and it was always about coming up with material, which is why I never really practised and have no chops!! When I left uni, I carried on playing and trying out at stand-up.

Actually, when you're doing something you love, even when you're busy and it's hectic you don't feel the need to relax. I never used to take holidays and it would upset ex-wives and girlfriends, but working has me in a better mood than doing nothing.

Louis Pasteur, the great scientist, said "chance favours the prepared mind", which is a posh way of saying 'do your homework', but it's an excellent piece of advice.

I'm not an alcoholic, I am freedom fighter against the teetotal taliban.

In the world of comedy, there's this: "If it's going badly, get off. If it's going well, get off". You can't argue with that either.

My mum had a cousin that had played when he was younger. When I showed an interest in drumming, he showed me how to mummy-daddy roll and that set me up for a bit. And to be honest, it's all about the sound, the noise, the rattle and hum. Who wouldn't want to make a fantastic noise with drums and cymbals?!

The American dream? We don't have a dream in Britain because we're bloody awake!