You know, being a test pilot isn't always the healthiest business in the world.
Whether you are an astronomer or a life scientist, geophysicist, or a pilot, you've got to be there because you believe you are good in your field, and you can contribute, not because you are going to get a lot of fame or whatever when you get back.
Why don't you fix your little problem and light this candle?
I think first of all you have to be there for the right reason.
I must admit, maybe I am a piece of history after all.
The first plane ride was in a homemade glider my buddy and I built. Unfortunately we didn't get more than four feet off the ground, because it crashed.