There is nothing so good as a burial at sea. It is simple, tidy, and not very incriminating.

Someone once told me that every minute a murder occurs, so I don't want to waste your time, I know you want to go back to work.

A woman who spends all day washing and cooking and ironing doesn't want to go to the movies to watch a film about a woman who spends all day washing and cooking and ironing.

I'm not against the police; I'm just afraid of them.

I never said all actors are cattle; what I said was all actors should be treated like cattle.

I enjoy playing the audience like a piano.

There are several differences between a footballl game and a revolution. For one thing, a football game usually lasts longer and the participants wear uniforms. Also there are more injuries at a football game.