It would be difficult to convince me that leaning has no effect whatsoever on the outcome of my bowling.

I am a slow reader, and fast eater; I wish it were the other way around.

I'm turning left. Look, everyone, my blinker is on, and I'm turning left. I am so happy to be alive, driving along, making a left turn. I'm serious. I am doing exactly what I want to be doing at this moment: existing on a Tuesday, going about my business, on my way somewhere, turning left.

If you want to grow up to be a big, strong pea, you have to eat your candy," Papa Pea would say.

It often feels like I'm not so much living for the present as I am busy making memories for the future.

No one ever went to their deathbed saying, 'You know, I wish I'd eaten more rice cakes.

If someone is in a bad mood, tickling only makes it worse.