Fundamentalist Muslim terrorists kill three thousand Americans, but America isn't supposed to respond, because if we respond, they'll respond. We always hear about 'karmic retributions' and the 'cycle of violence' only after we've been hit.

Liberals are stalwart defenders of civil liberties - provided we're only talking about criminals.

The question isn't whether we 'need' guns. It's wether the government should have a monopoly on force

If liberals were prevented from ever again calling Republicans dumb, they would be robbed of half their arguments. To be sure, they would still have racist, fascist, homophobe, ugly, and a few other highly nuanced arguments in the quiver. But the loss of dumb would nearly cripple them.

As the leader of twelve apostles, even Jesus had more executive experience than Obama.

The New York Times and the rest of the mainstream media will only refer to partial birth abortion as 'what its opponents refer to as partial birth abortions.' What do its supporters call it? Casual Fridays? Bean-with-bacon potato chip dip? Uh . . . Steve?

I've decided to cut out the part of the speech where I say anything nice about Democrats.