I have a cat, the pet that ranks just above a throw pillow in terms of required responsibility.

What had I expected of the first child? Everything. Rocket scientist. Neurosurgeon. Designated hitter. We talked wisely at cocktail parties about the sad mistake our mothers had made in pinning all their hopes and dreams on us. We were full of it.

I know a lot and have written a lot and have thought a lot about motherhood.

Real friends offer both hard truths and soft landings and realize that it's sometimes more important to be nice than to be honest.

It often seems, looking back, that the unexpected comes to define us, the paths we didn't see coming and may have wandered down by mistake. The older we get the more willing we are to follow those, to surprise ourselves.

We don't do ambivalence well in America. We do courage of our convictions. We do might makes right. Ambivalence is French. Certainty is American.

All of the qualities that you need to be a good opinion columnist tend to be qualities that aren't valued in women.