Life's too short. Start with Dessert!

I also have intense relationships with furniture... probably because we practically had none when I was growing up.

What does it mean when people applaud? Should I give 'em money? Say thank you? Lift my dress? The lack of applause - that I can respond to.

Most awards, you know, they don't give you unless you go and get them - did you know that? Terribly discouraging.

I can take any truth; just don't lie to me.

What reaches an audience is honesty. If you're saying something truthful that's supposed to be a funny line, it's going to be funny. And if it's supposed to be a serious line, it's going to be serious. But, I don't think there's a distinction between how you play drama or comedy, if it's based in the truth.

The idea of a liberal media bias is simply a myth. If only it were true, we might have a more humane, open-minded, and ultimately effective public debate on the issues facing the country.