A central tenet of modern feminist thought has been the assertion that "all women are oppressed." This assertion implies that women share a common lot, that factors like class, race, religion, sexual preference, etc. do not create a diversity of experience that determines the extent to which sexism will be an oppressive force in the lives of individual women.
Bell HooksHow different things might be if, rather than saying "I think I'm in love," we were saying "I've connected with someone in a way that makes me think I'm on the way to knowing love." Or if instead of saying "I am in love" we say "I am loving" or "I will love." Our patterns around romantic love are unlikely to change if we do not change our language.
Bell HooksI mostly want to remind her of the recipes of healing, and give her my own made-on-the spot remedy for the easing of her pain. I tell her, โGet a pen. Stop crying so you can write this down and start working on it tonight.โ My remedy is long. But the last item on the list says: โWhen you wake up and find yourself living someplace where there is nobody you love and trust, no community, it is time to leave town โ to pack up and go (you can even go tonight). And where you need to go is any place where there are arms that can hold you, that will not let you go.
Bell Hooks