If you want a neat wife, choose her on a Saturday.

Wise men don't need advice. Fools won't take it.

An autobiography usually reveals nothing bad about its writer except his memory.

When I see nothing annihilated, and not even a drop of water wasted, I cannot suspect the annihilation of souls Thus finding myself to exist in the world, I believe I shall, in some shape or other, always exist; with all the inconveniences human life is liable to, I shall not object to a new edition of mine; hoping, however, that the errata of the last may be corrected.

Happiness depends more on the inward disposition of mind than on outward circumstances.

A life of leisure and a life of laziness are two things. There will be sleeping enough in the grave.

He that steals the old man's supper does him no wrong.