Have nothing to do with coaches. In fact, if you should see one coming, go and hide behind the pavilion until he goes away.

I just think Barack [Obama], he doesn't dig being asked at all. He's got a bit of an imperious nature about him. I guess nobody has told him that nobody reads newspapers anymore. That is a dying art form.

Saturday night at my house, I often trot out classic movies and force the urchins to watch them. There is much wailing and gnashing of teeth, but I think it's important to teach kids about American culture, and films are certainly a big part of it.

You must know the difference between dissent from the Iraq war and the war on terror and undermining it. And any American that undermines that war, with our soldiers in the field, or undermines the war on terror, with 3,000 dead on 9/11, is a traitor. Everybody got it? Dissent, fine; undermining, you're a traitor. Got it? So, all those clowns over at the liberal radio network, we could incarcerate them immediately. Will you have that done, please? Send over the FBI and just put them in chains, because they, you know, they're undermining everything and they don't care, couldn't care less.

There are a lot of very brilliant scholars who believe the reason we have incomplete science on evolution is that there is a higher power involved in this.

I've got nothing against gay marriage, it's not my issue. All right, I want homosexual Americans to be happy and to pursue happiness.

I'm a sensationalist. I'm a big mouth. I get attention. In this world you have to - if you want a mass-market presentation, you have to get attention.