I'll be selling tickets for my next tour exclusively through Jonah Lehrer. Make sure to pay cash.

I have tried my hand at bribery, blackmail, and deceit. And I've served time for everything, cept beggin on the street.

Life has its ups and downs, and time has to be your partner. Really, time is your soul mate.

Back seat drivers don’t know the feel of the wheel but they sho’ know how to make a fuss" Bob Dylan/Bonnie Raitt, “Let’s Keep It Between Us,” 1982

It's not important what other people call you. If you yourself know you're a fake, that's tougher to live with.

Is your money that good, will it buy you forgiveness?

I forgot more than you'll ever know.