What children learn from punishment is that might makes right. When they are old and strong enough, they will try to get their ownback; thus many children punish their parents by acting in ways distressing to them.
Bruno BettelheimThe parent must not give in to his desire to try to create the child he would like to have, but rather help the child to develop--in his own good time--to the fullest, into what he wishes to be and can be, in line with his natural endowment and as the consequence of his unique life in history.
Bruno BettelheimWhat cannot be talked about cannot be put to rest. And if it is not, the wounds will fester from generation to generation.
Bruno BettelheimTo be told that our child's behavior is "normal" offers little solace when our feelings are badly hurt, or when we worry that hisactions are harmful at the moment or may be injurious to his future. It does not help me as a parent nor lessen my worries when my child drives carelessly, even dangerously, if I am told that this is "normal" behavior for children of his age. I'd much prefer him to deviate from the norm and be a cautious driver!
Bruno BettelheimThe unrealistic nature of these tales (which narrowminded rationalists object to) is an important device, because it makes obvious that the fairy talesโ concern is not useful information about the external world, but the inner process taking place in an individual.
Bruno BettelheimPlato--who may have understood better what forms the mind of man than do some of our contemporaries who want their children exposed only to "real" people and everyday events--knew what intellectual experience made for true humanity. He suggested that the future citizens of his ideal republic begin their literary education with the telling of myths, rather than with mere facts or so-called rational teachings.
Bruno Bettelheim