No man can be a genius in slapshoes and a flat hat.

If one more person tells me this is just like old times, I swear I'll jump out the window.

Not long ago a friend asked me what was the greatest pleasure I got from spending my whole life as an actor. There have been so many that I had to think about that for a moment. Then I said, 'Like everyone else, I like to be with a happy crowd'.

What really got my goat at MGM were comedians like The Marx Brothers who never wrote their own jokes.

The funny thing about our act is that dad gets the worst of it, although I'm the one who apparently receives the bruises [...] the secret is in landing limp and breaking the fall with a foot or a hand. It's a knack. I started so young that landing right is second nature with me. Several times I'd have been killed if I hadn't been able to land like a cat. Imitators of our act don't last long, because they can't stand the treatment.

I don't feel qualified to talk about my work.

All my life I have been happiest when the folks watching me said to each other, `Look at the poor dope, wilya?