Heaven. The biggest waste of our time we ever invented, outside jigsaws.

I wish I could learn that just three drinks is enough, but I have not learned that.

Self-harm - the world will come at you with knives anyway. You do not need to beat them to it.

When you talk to a young teenage girl, they're just full of self-loathing. The reason they feel self-loathing is they don't feel normal. It is a world that has not been built for them. It's been built for men, and that's why they feel bad.

I just want Tina Fey to be my best friend. And Lena Dunham. And Oprah, too.

I never wanted to be famous. It was amusing at first, but now I hate it. I just wanted to be respected by people I respect. And I wanted to be rich. It's best to get rich, then you can do what you want.

I can't think of anything I hate more than a former punk - they are the most self-righteous people in the world.