I hoped my absence made them happy or at least made them forget that they weren't happy and never will be.

You young people never say anything. And us old folks don't know how to stop talking.

The only use for military service is that it reveals the number of morons in the population," he would remark. "And that can be discovered in the first two weeks; there's no need for two years. Army, Marriage, the Church and Banking: the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse. Yes, go on, laugh.

I've always thought that anyone who needs to join a herd so badly must be a bit of a sheep himself.

We think we understand a song's lyrics but what makes us believe in them, or not, is the music

How many lost souls do You need, Lord, to satisfy Your hunger? the hatter asked. God, in His infinite silence, looked at him without blinking.

There are few reasons for telling the truth, but for lying the number is infinite.