Okay I've been stupid in the past. Not consistently stupid, but occasionally stupid. And I've made mistakes. You bet, I've made mistakes.

I'm a middle-class former housewife who goes to my daughter's softball games.

When you're a professional you do your job no matter what gets in the way. You might take a sick day, you might take a personal day, but then you show back up or you won't get paid. Everyone develops his/her own strategy for dealing with days that are not productive.

Okay," I said. "I'd hoped to avoid this, but... Bill, I rescind your invitation into my house." Bill began walking backward to the door, a helpless look on his face, and my brush still in his hand. Eric grinned at him triumphantly. "Eric," I said, and his smile faded. "I rescind your invitation into my house." And backward he went, out my door and off my porch. The door slammed shut behind (or maybe in front of?) them.

Oh, God, puppy dog eyes. From a six-foot-five ancient Viking vampire.

The average woman would not be pondering how fast her date could kill her, but I’ll never be an average woman.

Just because one of Arlene's husbands was a murderer is no reason for me to be ugly