I sit here drunk now. I am a series of small victories and large defeats and I am as amazed as any other that I have gotten from there to here without committing murder or being murdered; without having ended up in the madhouse. as I drink alone again tonight my soul despite all the past agony thanks all the gods who were not there for me then.

Trouble and pain were what kept a man alive. Or trying to avoid trouble and pain. It was a full time job.

to fight for each minute is to fight for what is possible within yourself, so that your life and your death will not be like theirs.

I like the way Mahler wandered about in his music and still retained his passion. He must have looked like an earthquake walking down the street.

…He was always high on drugs. I was not a drug man, but in case I wanted to hide from myself for a few days, I knew I could get anything I wanted from him.

When you drank the world was still out there, but for the moment it didn’t have you by the throat.

purple does something strange to me