when I am feeling low all i have to do is watch my cats and my courage returns

my beerdrunk soul is sadder than all the dead christmas trees of the world.

Love came hard and very seldom. When it did it was usually for the wrong reasons.

The more cats you have, the longer you live. If you have a hundred cats, you'll live ten times longer than if you have ten. Someday this will be discovered, and people will have a thousand cats and live forever.

I would be married, but I'd have no wife, I would be married to a single life.

I wanted the whole world or nothing.

I think a man can keep on drinking for centuries, he'll never die; especially wine or beer...I like drunkards, man, because drunkards, they come out of it, and they're sick and they spring back, they spring back and forth...If I hadn't been a drunkard, I probably would have committed suicide long ago.