A house does not need a wife any more than it needs a husband.

I used to lie awake as a child and get more entertainment and terror out of blank walls and plain furniture than most children could find in a toy-store.

There was a time when Patience ceased to be a virtue. It was long ago.

In the field of economics we maintain to this day some of the most primitive ideas, some of the most radically false ideas, some of the most absurd ideas a brain can hold. ... but all this give no uneasiness to the average brain. That long-suffering organ has been trained for more thousands of years than history can uncover to hold in unquestioning patience great blocks of irrelevant idiocy and large active lies.

To work is not only a right, it is a duty. To work to the full capacity of one's powers is necessary for human development - the full use of one's best faculties - this is the health and happiness for both man and woman.

It is the same woman, I know, for she is always creeping, and most women do not creep by daylight.

Audiences are always better pleased with a smart retort, some joke or epigram, than with any amount of reasoning.