A good story should change the way you see the world.

You cannot be the person they know and the great, glorious person you want to become. Not at the same time.

Parents are like God because you wanna know they're out there, and you want them to think well of you, but you really only call when you need something.

I don't do much more than organise other people's ideas and insights and thoughts, and sort of harvest them, and inventory them and present them.

I know that when a supersexy older girl with hips and breasts and nice hair wants to take off your glasses and to paint you a smoky eye she's merely trying to enroll you in a beauty contest she's already won. It's a kind of slummy, condescending gesture, like when rich people ask poor people where they summer. To me, this smacks of a blatant, insensitive "let them eat cake" type of chauvinism.

Some mythological fat asswipe drives our national economy.

Katherine Kenton remains among the generation of women who feel that the most sincere form of flattery is the male erection.