We don't need women. There are plenty other things in the world to have sex with, just go to a sexaholics meeting and take notes. There's microwaved watermelons. There's the vibrating handles of lawn mowers right at crotch level. There's vacuum cleaners and beanbag chairs. Internet sites. All those old chat room sex hounds pretending to be sixteen-year-old girls. For serious, old FBI guys makes the sexiest cyberbabes.

Marla's philosophy of life, she told me, is that she can die at any moment. The tragedy of her life is that she doesn't.

What you have to consider is the possibility that God doesn't like you. Could be, God hates us. This is not the worst thing that could happen.

These days, most of the people you hear laughing are dead.

Parenthood is the opiate of the masses.

Also consider that someday, when you’re dead and rotted, kids with their baby teeth will sit in their time-geography class and laugh about how stupid you were.

Hey, you created me! I didn't create some loser alter-ego to make myself feel better. Take some responsibility!