It was as if something snapped in two deep inside me. My parents-- the people I’d loved the most in the world, the ones I’d always told all my secrets to, the ones I’d wanted to hide with far away from the rest of the world. They had lied, and I couldn’t imagine why. It couldn’t possibly matter why.

Lucas had told me only one lie, ever; he kept the secret of black Cross because it wasn’t his secret to tell. In every other way, he’d been honest with me and shared the hard truths nobody else thought I deserved to hear.

He breathed out, not quite a laugh or a sob. "God, yes. Bianca, I love you so much. Even if I never see you again, even if we walk out of here into an ambush you set up with your parents, I am always going to love you.

Every single day was just a box on the calendar that I could put a red X through; each one brought me closer to Lucas and to liberty.

Huging my pillow to my chest, I told myself, At least soon you won't have so much time to miss him. Soon school will start again, and then you'll be busier. Wait. Am I reduced to HOPING for school to start? Somehow, I have discovered a whole new level of pathetic.

I know we only talked once-" "But it meant something to you." Our eyes met for only an instant. "It meant something to me, too. I just didn't realize - Well, I thought it was only me.

Is this what it means to die? Lucas thought. Because I’m not scared of it anymore. Not if it means I finally get this close to you.