I won't have to miss smoking any more. Nobody smokes where I'm going: It's like a row of restaurants in California.

Mocking Hugh Hefner is easy to do, and in my mind should be made easier.

Twin miracles of mascara, her eyes looked like the corpses of two small crows that had crashed into a chalk cliff.

As far as talent goes, Marilyn Monroe was so minimally gifted as to be almost unemployable, and anyone who holds to the opinion that she was a great natural comic identifies himself immediately as a dunce.

Every sentence he manages to utter scatters its component parts like pond water from a verb chasing its own tail.

I try to be specific. One thought at a time. Clear. Articulate. And above all, memorable, if you can be. You'd like to write phrases that people can't forget as soon as they read them.

She wasn't just beautiful. She was like the sun coming up: coming up giggling. She was giggling as if she had just remembered something funny.