The latest political rumor, North Korea ruler Kim Jong Il is close to naming his successor. Yeah, he said the only person with glasses big enough to replace me is Nicole Richie.
Conan O'BrienIt is our failure to become our perceived ideal that ultimately defines us and makes us unique.
Conan O'BrienA European brewery has purchased Anheuser-Busch, the makers of Budweiser, for $52 billion. Which is a a shame because if they had waited until happy hour, they could have paid half that.
Conan O'BrienMedical marijuana users are now lobbying for the right to carry firearms. Because no one is a better shot than a stoned old man with glaucoma.
Conan O'BrienAll I ask is one thing, and Iโm asking this particularly of young people: please donโt be cynical. I hate cynicism, for the record, itโs my least favorite quality and it doesnโt lead anywhere. Nobody in life gets exactly what they thought they were going to get. But if you work really hard and youโre kind, amazing things will happen.
Conan O'Brien