God dealt with our whole situation on the cross; there is nothing left for you to settle. Just say to Him, 'Lord, I cannot forgive and I will no longer try to do it; but I trust that You in me will do it. I can't forgive and love; but I trust that You will forgive and love in my place and that You will do these things in me.'

It is not on our forgiveness any more than on our goodness that the world's healing hinges, but His. When He tells us to love our enemies, He gives, along with the command, the love itself.

(on forgiveness) Didn't he and I stand together before an all seeing God convicted of the same murder? For I had murdered him with my heart and my tongue.

God has plans, not problems for our lives.

Trying to do the Lord's work in your own strength is the most confusing, exhausting, and tedious of all work. But when you are filled with the Holy Spirit, then the ministry of Jesus just flows out of you.

I looked on Jesus and the dove of peace entered my heart. I looked at the dove of peace; and lo...off he went.

If you want to hear God's voice clearly and you are uncertain, then remain in His presence until He changes this uncertainty. Often much can happen during this waiting for the Lord. Sometimes, He changes pride into humility; doubt into faith and peace; sometimes lust into purity. The Lord can and will do it.