Life isn't fair," he said, in his undisguised voice, and for once the Baudelaire orphans agreed with every word the man said.

There are secrets everywhere. I think everyone's parents have secrets. You just have to know where to look for them.

If you wish to avoid an unpleasant story you had best put this book down

I was not a particularly brave child, I think, because I had a narrative mind, because my mind automatically went to any terrible thing that could happen.

Grief, a type of sadness that most often occurs when you have lost someone you love, is a sneaky thing, because it can disappear for a long time, and then pop back up when you least expect it.

A mystery is solved with a story.

Dead women tell no tales. Sad men write them down.