It is one of the peculiar truths of life that people often say things that they know full well are ridiculous.

For Beatrice, when we first met, I was lonely, and you were pretty. Now I am pretty lonely.

Having an aura of menace is like having a pet weasel, because you rarely meet someone who has one, and when you do, it makes you want to hide under the coffee table.

Let’s go, let’s go together toward something extraordinary and I started making plans, thinking we would get that far.

You might find it difficult to see anything but your own sadness, the way smoke can cover a landscape so that all anyone can see is black. You may find that if someone pours water all over you, you are damp and distracted, but not cured of your sadness, the way a fire department can douse a fire but never recover what has been burnt down.

They didn't understand it, but like so many unfortunate events in life, just because you don't understand it doesn't mean it isn't so.

I was so grateful that Lemony Snicket wasn't the worst movie ever made that I overlooked many things that might have otherwise upset me.