One has to adopt a sort of Zen calm, in which you know you wrote the best book that you could at the time.

If an optimist had his left arm chewed off by an alligator, he might say in a pleasant and hopeful voice, "Well this isn't too bad, I don't have a left arm anymore but at least nobody will ever ask me if I'm left-handed or right-handed," but most of us would say something more along the lines of, "Aaaaaa! My arm! My arm!"

I was once almost forced off the stage at a large chain bookstore that shall remain nameless, because she introduced me as Lemony Snicket, and I immediately interrupted her and said, "Oh no, Lemony Snicket isn't here," and then she tried to cancel the event right then and there.

Chestnuts in stuffing tastes like someone chewed up a tree branch and then French-kissed it into your mouth.

You’re just jealous of me because I’m a tap-dancing ballerina fairy princess veterinarian!

It is often difficult to admit that someone you love is not perfect, or to consider aspects of a person that are less than admirable.

My general writing preface is to write an outline and then ignore about half of it, both on a micro level with the individual book, and on a macro level with the series as a whole, and that's pretty much what's happened.