I grew up in the Southwest Bronx. Father an accountant, mother a schoolteacher. Brother was six years older, which explains why I gobbled crystal meth at 12, smoked hashish at 13, and was shooting smack at 17, which explains how I got Hepatitis C, which was the basis of my first book, which was a humor book about dying.

The other major kind of computer is the "Apple," which I do not recommend, because it is a wuss-o-rama New-Age computer you basically just plug in and use.

Do not put this product in a big vat and drop rats into it from a cat-walk.

You and Teacher,” said Molly. “Yes,” said Peter. “She’s very clever. You’ll like her.” “I’m sure,” said Molly.

Today's beauty ideal, strictly enforced by the media, is a person with the same level of body fat as a paper clip.

Never under any circumstances take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.

You should not confuse your career with your life.