I'm very bright, but I'm terrified of sounding like someone who thinks he's very bright-because those people are assholes.

I love the way you love, but I hate the way I'm supposed to love you back.

Lucky people develop a relationship with a certain kind of art that becomes spiritual, almost religious, and doesn’t mean, you know, church stuff, but it means you’re just never the same.

The integrity of my sleep has been forever compromised, sir.

I'd tell you all you want and more, if the sounds I made could be what you hear

Although the only way that I'm well known at Illinois State is that I am the "grammar Nazi." And so any student whose deployment of a semi-colon is not absolutely Mozart-esque knows that they're going to get a C in my class, and so my classes tend to have like four students in them. It's really a lot of fun.

And when he came to, he was flat on his back on the beach in the freezing sand, and it was raining out of a low sky, and the tide was way out.