In my family, in the days prior to television, we liked to while away the evenings by making ourselves miserable, solely based on our ability to speak the language viciously.

Put. That coffee. Down. Coffee's for closers only.

President Obama seems to understand the Constitution as a 'set of suggestions.'

Hitchcock denigrated American films, saying they were all 'pictures of people talking' - as, indeed, most of them are.

Being a writer in Hollywood is like going to Hitler's Eagle Nest with a great idea for a bar mitzvah.

The correct unit of study is not the play; it is the scene.

I've been alienating my public since I was 20 years old. When 'American Buffalo' came out on Broadway, people would storm out and say, 'How dare he use that kind of language!' Of course I'm alienating the public! That's what they pay me for.