In the two months I had also dated Justin Fellowes, this guy in my Spanish class, though after three weeks we decided we should "see other people," which in my case was a joke, but it beat hearing him remark on everything I ate. 'I don't know why girls are always on a diet,' he'd say when I ordered a Diet Coke, and 'You should watch your starch intake' when I had a muffin.

The favorite game of temperamental people is Try to Guess Why I’m Ticked Off. (Contestant number one, Why do YOU think he’s pissed off? Why, I’m not sure, Bob, but I’m going to go with ‘Because I Left the Faucet Dripping.’ BEEP. I’m sorry, that’s incorrect. The correct answer is: ‘Because You Happen to Exist.’)

We can get so wrapped up in our own misconceptions that we miss the simple beauty of the truth.

If time heals all wounds, and a book can hold a person's entire life, then you can speed up the process with a pulp time warp.

But, dear God, don't listen to me. I'm an old lady in the middle of nowhere without a real toilet.

It's shocking the things we call love.

Look right at it. Know you can." Dad said. "Look right at that fear. Fear is the biggest bullshitter.