The only other scenario that could explain everything, up to and including your own bizarre apperance, is a convoluted conspiracy theory involving the Russian Mafia and a crack team of plastic surgeons.

Artemis: Holly, how did you find me? Holly: Oh, I saw a huge explosion and wondered: now, who could that be?

I have to tell you, Arty, a screw up this early in the proceedings doesn't exactly fill me with confidence. I hope you're as clever as you keep telling everyone you are." "I never tell anybody exactly how clever I am. They would be too scared.

Yes, Chix, it's between us. Everyone has a right to be temporarily unstable. - Foaly

Together we will be unstoppable.

My truffles? You took them? That's just mean!

I bet," said Mulch, "that you would set the world on fire just to watch it burn." Opal tapped the suggestion into a small electronic notepad on her pocket computer. Thanks for that. Now, tell me everything.