I was disappointed in everything - my start and the team's start. People got down on me, but I never got down on myself. I still believed I could be the type of player everyone, including me, thought I was going to be.

Socially, it is funny. People are annoyed because, really who is a clown?.

I was disappointed in everything - my start and the team's start. People got down on me, but I never got down on myself. I still believed I could be the type of player everyone, including me, thought I was going to be.

Circulating through the children's ward and seeing terminally ill kids, heads shaved, smiling and having a ball despite the tubes and needles sticking into them, I thought: What do I have to worry about? If God takes me, at least I've lived for 35 years.

Come on, when does it come to the point where your name can't come up in trade talks? Willie Mays got traded. Pedro Martinez got traded. So what? That's part of the game.

I'd never heard of colon cancer. Baseball wasn't even important to me. I have a wife and two girls. That's what was important. The doctors told me and all I could say was, 'When are we going to get this thing out?'

Blessings can come in a number of ways. The Lord doesn't give you what you want, the Lord gives you what you need.