Baseball is a game played by idiots for morons.

Good manners are an admission that everybody is so tender that they have to be handled with gloves. Now, human respect—you don't call a man a coward or a liar lightly, but if you spend your life sparing people's feelings and feeding their vanity, you get so you can't distinguish what should be respected in them.

Books are like brothers. I am an only child. Gatsby [is] my imaginary eldest brother.

If you're in love it ought to make you happy. You ought to laugh.

...I think he revalued everything in his house according to the measure of response it drew from her well-loved eyes.

No one person in the world is necessary to you or to me.

sometimes i wish i'd been an englishman; american life is so damned dumb and stupid and healthy