A joke is an epigram on the death of a feeling.

Natural death is independent of all reason and is really an irrational death, in which the pitiable substance of the shell determines how long the kernel is to exist or not; in which, accordingly, the stunted, diseased and dull witted jailer is lord, and indicates the moment at which his distinguished prisoner shall die.

You want to make him interested in you? Then pretend to be embarrassed in his presence-

The idealist is incorrigible: if he is thrown out of his heaven he makes an ideal of his hell.

Every church is a stone on the grave of a god-man: it does not want him to rise up again under any circumstances.

There is not sufficient religion in the world merely to put an end to the number of religions.

We must understand how to hide in darkness in order to escape the gnat-swarms of utterly annoying admirers.