Many years ago, in the throes of my struggles on the PGA Tour, I had difficulty even getting into pro-ams. I needed money, so I put together a 45-minute magic show I'd perform at corporate events surrounding the tournament.

In Valdosta, Ga., during a mini-tour event, a player named James Black bet me $20 he could put five golf balls in his mouth and then close his mouth all the way. I tried it but could get only two in there.

He hits the ball a long way and he knows how to win.

He's in the mold of a Tom Watson, in that he'll hit the ball in the trees and undaunted go it there, flail it out and make something out of it.

Think of golf as chess. You have to think two or three moves ahead every time you hit the ball. Over every shot, you should be thinking, 'Where do I need to put this ball in order to make my next shot as easy as possible.

I hate to repeat lines, to say the same damned thing. I try to rewrite cliches and make what I say sound fresh.

I'm nearsighted in my right eye, have glaucoma in my left, and the nerves in my hands are on Medicare. Basically, I'm on the wrong end of a short sale.