I have never yet met anyone who did not think it was an agreeable sensation to cut tinfoil with scissors.

To many people virtue consists chiefly in repenting faults, not in avoiding them.

There exists a species of transcendental ventriloquism by means of which men can be made to believe that something said on earth comes from Heaven.

I have remarked very clearly that I am often of one opinion when I am lying down and of another when I am standing up.

The greater part of human misery is caused by indolence.

One should never trust a person who, while assuring you of something, puts his hands on his heart.

A person reveals his character by nothing so clearly as the joke he resents.