You have to choose between trusting to the natural stability of gold and the natural stability of the honesty and intelligence of the members of the government. And, with due respect to these gentlemen, I advise you, as long as the capitalist system lasts, to vote for gold.

Your heart and your mouth wil be in two separate parts of your body if you again forget in whose presence you stand.

You do not settle whether an argument is justified by merely showing that it is of some use. The distinction is not between useful and useless experiments but between barbarous and civilized behaviour. Vivisection is a social evil because if it advances human knowledge, it does so at the expense of human character.

There is no accomplishment so easy to acquire as politeness and none more profitable.

Even to this day it is easier than it ought to be for me to get a rise out of an American by telling him something about himself which is equally true about every human being on the face of the globe. He at once resents this as a disparagement and an assertion on my part that people in other parts of the globe are not like that, and are loftily superior to such weaknesses.

I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play; bring a friend... if you have one.

There is only one person an English girl hates more than she hates her elder sister; and that is her mother.