I don't smoke because I like to do so, but because it makes me pay cigarette taxes, which helps build roads and water supplies.

Don't try to outguess what's going on in publishing, and write what you want to write.

Keep a small can of WD-40 on your desk-away from any open flames-to remind yourself that if you don't write daily, you will get rusty.

One day we will all cherish the memory of having blacksmiths on every corner.

Think about all the selfish non-smokers out there, driving around on asphalt, drinking water out of the tap, not even thinking about how smokers' taxes help pay for it all.

Gilles Deleuze believed that every society needed a madman so we could feel better about ourselves. I do my best to fill that role.

There's a ton of truth in Flannery O'Connor's notion that "Anybody who has survived his childhood has enough information about life to last him the rest of his days."