As you get older the odds are against you that you are still going to be on the planet.

Every morning just before breakfast I don't want no coffee or tea, just me and my good Buddy Wieser, that's all I ever need.

On the day I was born, the nurses gathered around, to gaze in wide wonder at the joy they had found.

Whatever title you want to lay on me is fine. I am still working; you know what I'm saying?

I make a rich woman beg, I'll make a good woman steal. I'll make an old woman blush, and make a young woman squeal.

I drink alone. Yeah, with nobody else. You know when I drink alone, I prefer to be by myself.

If you don't start drinking, I'm gonna leave.