We talk of wild animals, but the wildest animal is man.

The ignorant pronounce it Frood To cavil or applaud The well-informed pronounce it Froyd But I pronounce it Fraud.

With every step of our lives we enter into the middle of some story which we are certain to misunderstand.

One elephant having a trunk was odd; but all elephants having trunks looked like a plot.

The strangest whim has seized me ... After all I think I will not hang myself today.

The greenhorn is the ultimate victor in everything; it is he that gets the most out of life.

Men feel that cruelty to the poor is a kind of cruelty to animals. They never feel that it is an injustice to equals; nay it is treachery to comrades.