And they that rule in England, in stately conclaves met, alas, alas for England they have no graves as yet.

Bigotry is an incapacity to conceive seriously the alternative to a proposition.

Comforts that were rare among our forefathers are now multiplied in factories and handed out wholesale; and indeed, nobody nowadays, so long as he is content to go without air, space, quiet, decency and good manners, need be without anything whatever that he wants; or at least a reasonably cheap imitation of it.

My life is passed in making bad jokes and seeing them turn into true prophecies.

A really great person is the person who makes every person feel great.

Man is always something worse or something better than an animal; and a mere argument from animal perfection never touches him at all. Thus, in sex no animal is either chivalrous or obscene. And thus no animal invented anything so bad as drunkeness - or so good as drink.

The things we see every day are the things we never see at all.