A thing may be too sad to be believed or too wicked to be believed or too good to be believed; but it cannot be too absurd to be believed in this planet of frogs and elephants, of crocodiles and cuttle-fish.

Even in an empire of atheists the dead man is always sacred.

When giving treats to friends or children, give them what they like, emphatically not what is good for them.

A cosmic philosophy is not constructed to fit a man; a cosmic philosophy is constructed to fit a cosmos. A man can no more possess a private religion than he can possess a private sun and moon.

Theology is only thought applied to religion.

But since he stood for England And knew what England means, Unless you give him bacon You must not give him beans.

The Bible tells us to love our neighbors, and also to love our enemies; probably because they are generally the same people.